It’s understandable that the average woman would think she was incapable of pulling off beautiful, sexy, sensual, elegant, or model-like looks (let alone in front of a camera). You see those beautiful models and celebrities on TV and in magazines and think you could never look good in front of a camera. You may not have been born with the same symmetry or physical features, but I would humbly have to disagree. I believe anyone can look gorgeous. Sometimes you just need someone else’s eyes (and camera) to help show you.
Can you guess which of these photos is of a new model, experienced model, or non-model (client)? I bet you won’t get it! [Read on to check if you were right.]
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND A MODEL
I’ve worked with non-models (the majority of my clients), new models, and some experienced models. Want the truth? I actually prefer to work with the first two groups. The reason is that the experienced models already have the confidence and experience to know how to look great in front of the camera. So why don’t I like to work with them as much? It’s because it isn’t a challenge; it’s almost boring. However, working with experienced models is important when shooting commercial fashion shoots because time is money and time constraints are always present.
…models already have the confidence and experience to know how to look great in front of the camera.
You didn’t hear me say that they are more beautiful for a reason. They may in fact be more beautiful, but usually models are chosen based on specific characteristics that fit the look that the creative director or brand is going for. Remember when gap-toothed models were sought after? Maybe they still are…I don’t know. It’s something different about them that makes the images stand out. So what allows them to look so great in front of the camera…really? Confidence and experience!
HOW TO GAIN CONFIDENCE
Both confidence and experience come with time, practice, and nurturing. Here are some tips, in no particular order, that can help you gain confidence (I admittedly do some of these myself!):
- Get comfortable with yourself.
- We all hate to do it, but start looking at yourself in the mirror more. Take a look at your body and pick out the things you like best. It can even be small things like the smoothness of your skin, the delicateness of your wrists, or the curve of your neck and shoulder. Do this everyday before and after you hop in the shower.
- Of course, it isn’t all about what’s on the outside so sit down and think about some of the things you think make you a good person. I’m not asking you to get arrogant here, just humbly proud. Think about what makes you a great friend, wife, mother, daughter, and even stranger. Feel free to write them down so you don’t forget! ;)
- Tell yourself something good.
- Get in front of that mirror again and give yourself a nice verbal “pat on the back”. If you’re having trouble thinking about what to say you can go with the tried-and-true method of Ron Burgundy:
- Stay away from media that brings you down.
- If you find that beauty product ads make you feel less good about yourself then flip that magazine page quickly or change the channel. Keep in mind that a lot of products for women use negative advertising in that they tell you what’s wrong with you so they can provide you with a product to fix it. The problem is that you probably wouldn’t have noticed them or even think that they were problems without them telling you. Although this applies for some advertising of men’s products, there are less of products to begin with and they’re also more positive. They tend to focus on how they can make men even better looking without first bringing up what’s wrong with them.
- Get active.
- Do something that makes you feel good; you don’t even have to be good at it. If you love to play soccer then start kicking away; if crafts is more your thing then start cutting and pasting; if you love to paint then start filling that palette; if your calling is singing then grab that mic; and if dancing helps you let loose then dance the night away. You’re already happy doing these things and doing them even more will make you better at them. It just snowballs from there and soon you’re rolling down a hill in a big, puffy ball screaming with glee.
- Surround yourself with positive people and things.
- Whether it’s lawn gnomes or your children, spend time with the people and things that add to your happiness. It’s hard to let go of the negative people in life, but sometimes you just have to do it. By helping yourself, you can later help others.
HAPPINESS BRINGS CONFIDENCE
So what did all of those things have to do with confidence? I basically gave you a list of things that would make you happy or positive. Happiness is confidence. Confidence is about understanding who you are, what makes you different and special, and being okay with your “imperfections”. Being happy and positive help you to see yourself in the best way possible; they help you to overcome that voice in the back of your mind that tells you you aren’t pretty enough, you don’t have what it takes, and that everyone else around you is better than you.
THE KEY IS TO BE COMFORTABLE
Confidence can take a while to build up. At first it may come in spurts like when you tell yourself how good you look in front of the mirror. Eventually it’ll be come more constant and then with time you won’t even think about it and it’ll become natural.
So what do you do if you want to have photos taken now, but don’t think you have the confidence? Perhaps your wedding is coming up or your fiance/fiancee wants to get engagement photos taken. One way is to hire a photographer who is understanding, listens to you, and can empathize with you. It has to be someone who you can trust. Not to sound outrageous, but you’re kind of bearing your soul to the camera. It is a reflection of who you are at that very moment in time.
Having a photographer who can capture you in a beautiful, elegant, sexy, confident, and/or sensual way is a double whammy (Anchorman reference intended). It will have a massive impact on your confidence because it will show you just what you are capable of. You’ll know that if you could relinquish your inhibitions and be comfortable (and confident), then damn woman…you could look this great all the time.
Here’s one last closer look…
Almost forgot…the answers (left to right): new model, non-model, experienced model
Jonathan How is the photographer behind Made by Ten and calls Milton his home. He specializes in creating beautiful, creative portraits of real women. He uses photography (and this blog) to help them build confidence and love for themselves and creates artistic images for their homes and offices. You can see him driving around the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) in Ontario, Canada from portrait to fashion shoot and back again.