At a young age I was told to “give because you want to” and later in life, especially in business, I was told to “give to receive”. That has caused a bit of confusion in the way I operate and perhaps you have the same concern in your own day-to-day life. Do you find you’re just giving in the hopes of receiving or because you want to make people happy?
BE GENEROUS AND GIVE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO
Giving without expectation is a beautiful thing, especially as a child. Did your parents teach you that too?
It was easy at the time because we had no real responsibility. All we had to do was be kids.
Sharing a sandwich or a toy with someone wasn’t such a big deal because we could easily get another one and we didn’t have to work for it.
When you’re able to give and not expect anything in return you are filled with an amazing feeling. Unfortunately, this is typically only possible if you are in a place of power.
THE DONATION EXAMPLE
For example, imagine you only have $1000 to your name and you donate $500. Other than the great feeling you get, you are getting nothing in return. That’s quite a large chunk of all that you have (in money in anyway). Would you be able to do this?
Now, let’s imagine you have $1M to your name and you donate the same $500. That was a lot easier right?
WEALTH
See, when you are in a place of power it is much easier to be generous and give without the expectation to receive. It isn’t limited to monetary wealth either.
Have you ever felt so happy that you nothing could bring you down. You probably had a smile on your face a lot and were a lot more pleasant. You were probably a lot more generous with your kindness. Maybe you didn’t realize it, but you were in a place of “happiness wealth” and you were sharing it with others without a thought of it being repaid to you.
GIVE AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE
That sounds great doesn’t it? And it also makes a lot of sense.
If you want to receive something good then you should give something good. It seems like a win-win situation all around! Who doesn’t want their generosity to be reciprocated or at least acknowledged?
Have you ever opened a door for someone and they don’t even look up? Even if you’re the most generous person in the world you probably felt the sting of that act.
THE BUSINESS WORLD
As a photographer with my own business (this one right here), I have had to study a lot about how to get the best clients.
I’ve heard everything from creating special offers (i.e. give away something extra or give a discount) to be able to get a client.
I’ve also heard to give away things and then at some point ask for something in return (i.e. for clients).
Finally, I’ve heard that you should keep giving until naturally, people are compelled to give you something in return.
I must admit that I’ve found it all rather confusing and I’ve probably tried it all. You can read more about my predicament on approaching potential clients if you’d like.
GENEROSITY: BUSINESS AND PERSONAL VIEW
For those of you wondering…in my business life I am currently doing a little bit of everything.
On this blog and on social media (links found at the top of this page) I am more-or-less giving without the expectation of receiving. I create content that I hope will inspire women to want to have their portrait taken by me. However, I have no expectation of it.
I’ll spring an offering here and there, but I do need to make money to live and to reinvest in this company. As I’ve mentioned many times I have big plans for what Made by Ten will do for women (hopefully beyond a local scale). The latter is the most important to me because I’d rather create a legacy of value for people over a quick buck.
On this website I’ve also got the typical business transaction of an offer for a product/service. In the case of portrait photography for women, I offer experiences that I think women will be able to cherish forever in exchange for money. I’ve got everything from quick, $500 photoshoots to $8000 day-long experiences.
I love mixing things up in my life because I can get bored very easily. Oddly enough, this also applies to my generosity. On the one hand I’ll gladly give without the need for compensation and on the other hand I only accept money in exchange.
In the end all that matters is being grateful that in some cases I have enough wealth to give because I want to and in other cases I can give something valuable that I can expect something in return.
So…why do you give?
Jonathan How is the photographer behind Made by Ten and calls Milton his home. He specializes in creating beautiful, creative portraits of real women. He uses photography (and this blog) to help them build confidence and love for themselves and creates artistic images for their homes and offices. You can see him driving around the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) in Ontario, Canada from portrait to fashion shoot and back again.